Category Archives: Testosterone Shots

Of the many reasons you should consider joining a golf club, one is the opportunity to play in tournaments with people you know, carrying handicaps you can trust. These tournaments take many forms but at my course, one of the most loved formats, the tournament that best cements relationships between male and female members, is the Ryder Cup competition.

About 25 years ago our PGA Professional suggested a male/female tournament that pitted the women against the men. The format would be 16 of each gender playing four nine hole events with each of the first three (alternate shot, better ball of partners and two person scramble) worth one point per two person match, then 16 single matches on the fourth nine worth a point each.

There would be no prizes, no money in the Golf Shop just bragging rights.

From the get-go both genders realized the importance of the tournament. Each male strives to establish his place as the Silver Backed Alpha Male (SBAM), while the women are more team oriented. Thinking about it, there is a startling parallel in each teams attitude to the real Ryder Cup the men are the individualistic American squad while the European team attitude prevailed with the women, who start each tournament by huddling, arms over each others shoulders and giving a rah-rah cheer bone chilling if you are a guy competitor.

The first year the women thoughtfully provided snacks and shots of scotch before the competition began; the food out of the kindness of their hearts, the booze a transparent tactic to befuddle the guys. Thus began the tradition of giving tee prizes to each other every year before the first ball was airborne. What this evolved into might be considered by outsiders to be misogyny and misandry, even rampant sexism, but all involved knows it for what it is great fun.

Plans for the tee gift are made weeks in advance, as each team tries to out-humiliate the other. It started out fairly benign the second year with the guys presenting the gals with personalized certificates for each woman, proclaiming their second place finish before the games began and the eventually victorious women returning them to the men at the end of the tournament, their name scratched out and replaced with their opponents moniker. The stage was set.

The women took first place four of the first five years, rendering us SBAMs emasculated, especially the year we received two pink golf balls in a small jock strap as our tee prize. We countered with retroactive trophies the next year bowling trophies, the bowler figure on top cut off and replaced with a Ryder cup, except the cup was a glued-on measuring cup. Other prizes included aprons for the women proclaiming their second place finish and a white belt for the men, printed with pictures of all of the SBAMs and the statement 2019 BSCC Women Belt Men. Which they then proceeded to do.

Then there was the lunch box with a faux stuffed crow inside; a bottle of wine relabeled as Chateau de Feat out of the Love Canal Vineyard, sporting a picture of toxic waste; Cracker Jack boxes that had been opened from the bottom and resealed after removing the original prize and replacing it with a ball marker labeled LOSER; a six pack sampler of beer relabeled with brands such as Boars Butt Beer and 17th Hole Pond Scum Lager.

One year the SBAMs got a case of Wheaties from the local supermarket, unopened, still in the original case, strapping and all. We carefully removed the strapping, put a redone front panel over each of the original boxes, with pictures of all 16 male players and slogans such as 100% whole wheat replaced with 100% Testosterone. It looked exactly like the original front panel and as we broke the strapping and opened the case to distribute the Wheaties boxes to the women, one of them quipped, I hope it has our pictures on it. Priceless.

Next years Ryder Cup will be held the week after that other one in Europe. Thirty-two women and men will meet on a Fall Saturday morning in the gazebo and determine the pairings amid atrocious trash talking before going out to battle. I cant wait.

Original post:
Battle of the sexes - Golf - Albany Times Union

With the recent confirmation of Amy Coney Barrett to the United States Supreme Court on Monday night, many Americans will most likely lose their access to affordable health care in the near future. And this is particularly disturbing to North Carolinians because, for almost a decade, Republican leadership in the states legislature has refused to expand Medicaid, despite support from voters on both parties. The Center for American Progress, an independent, nonpartisan policy institute, and NORC at the University of Chicago conducted a survey with 1,528 LGBTQIA+ identifying individuals in June.

In states that have not expanded Medicaid, the rate of LGBTQIA+ adults who are uninsured is 20 percent, the results state, adding that LGBTQIA+ adults making less than $45,000 a year are the ones most prominently affected. According to this survey, transgender folks and people with disabilities bear the brunt of the high cost of health care, as 51% of transgender individuals and 40% of people with disabilities who needed medical care postponed it due to cost, and 40% of transgender individuals and 30% of people with disabilities postponed preventative screenings due to cost.

A Greensboro-based virtual clinic with a focus on LGBTQ health hopes to support those living in the margins of society by providing virtual health care services to anyone living in North Carolina. Founded by Chief Operating Officer Jamie Clarke and Chief Medical Officer Dr. Subrata John Guha, the LGBTQ Clinic was conceptualized specifically with the health care needs of LGBTQIA+ people in mind.

If you have a phone, iPad, or computer, you can come see us, Guha said. You dont have to go anywhere just be seen where you are comfortable, and take a proactive approach for your health.

According to Clark and Guhas research, there are approximately 420,000 people that identify as LGBTQIA+ in North Carolina, and of those, 30,000 identify specifically as transgender. Clarke is one of those 30,000. Unfortunately, Clarke knows all too well the barriers that other trans people face when seeking health care.

I had a lot of problems getting comfortable, comprehensive medical care, she said. Not just about [Hormone Replacement Therapy] or sexual health, but about Jamie as a whole person, which encompasses all of those things and my day-to-day medical needs.

She said that the LGBTQIA+ community, as a whole, are not very trusting of doctors. As a transgender woman, she has experienced first-hand what that is like to be treated differently because of her gender identity. At age 35, Clarke decided that she wanted to begin transitioning by starting HRT, so like any other patient, she asked her doctor for more information.

I was dealing with a local doctor and asked to have my hormone levels checked, as I was getting bloodwork done anyway, she said. And they were like, well, why would you want to do that? And I was like, so I can start HRT, and she said, Oh, I am not comfortable doing that.

This experience led Clarke to switch to Dr. Guha. During her interview with him, she felt comfortable enough to ask about starting HRT because he was honest, straightforward, and extremely easy to talk to.

Clarke said when she told him that she was interested in starting HRT, he told her that he wasnt too familiar with it, so he had to do some more research to make sure he was doing it properly.

As we got to know each other, I was explaining to him that sometimes, I was at the point where I wanted to go online and figure out how to do it myself. But he was like thats probably not safe, Clarke said. And there are a whole lot of people that are in that exact boat. So, we are trying to take the stigma out of LGBTQIA+ health.

With The LGBTQ Clinic, Clarke and Guha said they are trying to create a movement toward community-based, equalized health care by building relationships with clients in a convenient and accessible format.

In the telemedicine space, typically what you get is a five-minute visit, sometimes not even by video but as a phone call, Clarke said. Our visits are 15 minutes long, and we strongly encourage getting to know your doctor, and vice versa, because you always get the same care provider.

Clarke described the LGBTQ Clinic as everything one would expect at a visit to their regular health care provider, only virtually.

One of our marketing specialists was like, think about it as going to the doctors office, not getting deadnamed, and you dont have to sit on the crunchy paper in a germ pool, Clarke said.

Guha explained that the LGBTQ Clinic could basically replace ones primary care doctor because it is all-encompassing and that everyone, not just LGBTQIA+ people, could receive health care services.

I can write a virtual prescription to your pharmacist, any pharmacist we are basically like walking into your doctors office but all virtual, Guha said. We cant administer shots, but if it can be self-administered, then I can prescribe it, and you can pick it up.

However, Guha said he makes sure he is thorough with each patient he sees.

When someone comes in, I dont just write a prescription for testosterone, he said. I want that lab work, and I would want to see the patient again after the lab work [results came back] to go over it and then provide the prescription.

The LGBTQ Clinic isnt Guhas first foray into providing fast and accessible health care services to people. Guha said he helped start FastMed back in the ancient ages of 2010, but sold out of it in 2014-2015 after the business was acquired by a venture capitalist. As a heterosexual, cisgender man, Guha said he believes that everyone should have the same access to health care and be treated equally, which is why he was more than happy to help start this clinic.

Guha takes pride in his informed approach to LGBTQIA+ health, as he follows the guidelines put out by the University of California at San Francisco and its Department of Internal Medicines sub-department, which is specifically tailored for the LGBTQIA+ community.

In the last five years, this premier medical center started putting out clinical protocols that established guidelines and state of the art, the scope of practice protocols, he noted.

Launching the LGBTQ Clinic hasnt been easy but has been a labor of love for both Clarke and Guha.

We are really excited about it, she said. Being in Greensboro, and with it being such a large college town, the need is absolutely there. One of the hardest things we are having problems with is trying to have conversations with influencers or people that can get the message out for us. I dont want to be a sponsored ad; I want to be a trusted resource.

Clarke said North Carolinas 2016 controversial Bathroom Bill was a big part of their discussion, and it was a driving factor as to why we would create this clinic specifically.

We dont have time for the noise, Clarke said of the recent politicizing of health care. We just want to provide quality health care to as many people that need it as we can...Its also about bringing some respectability to a state like North Carolina, where there is a lot of uncertainty about this particular issue.

Whoever is elected president in November, we will still be here, she added.

Clarke said each 15-minute virtual session costs $78 per visit, which she said is cheaper than the $150 that is usually charged by the local larger medical centers.

We are looking to do a subscription plan, but because we are so new, we are still testing the market, Guha said, adding that The LGBTQ Clinic will soon accept insurance coverage from Blue Cross Blue Shield of North Carolina, Cigna, United Care, and others.

We are actively pursuing the credentialing process, and its just a waiting game, Clarke said.

I am guessing in the next 30-60 days, and the reason why it is taking so long, as you probably already know, is because of COVID, Guha added.

Presently, there are two doctors (including Guha) and one nurse practitioner on staff at The LGBTQ Clinic. Clarke said she is looking for support from local LBGTQIA+ community leaders but makes it clear that they are not trying to buy their way into the community. Clarke and Guha said they arent in the business of just making a quick buck; they want to establish the LGBTQ Clinic as a long-term resource.

Health care should not be any different or any less quality because you are in the LGBTQ community, she said. We are trying to provide and be a voice to the movement. With a 30-veteran of the health care industry to say that your health care is no different or more valuable than anyone elses, that is the real distinction here.

For more information, visit the website and follow The LGBTQ Clinic on social media (Instagram and Facebook, @lgbtq.clinic)

Continue reading here:
New virtual clinic aims to provide accessible, inclusive health care to LGBTQIA+ North Carolinians - Yes! Weekly

The Trial of the Chicago 7 revisits a flashpoint in American history as written and directed by Aaron Sorkin and now available on Netflix.

Poster for The Trial of the Chicago 7

Sorkin is a master of the courtroom drama whose films often build to one climatic speech. Sorkins work includes the screenplays for A Few Good Men (You cant handle the truth), Malice (I am God!), The American President (I am the President), as well as The Social Network (Wheres your Facebook?) and his recent directorial debut Mollys Game (Because its my name!).Sorkin is also justly praised for The West Wing, where Walk and Talk shots became a signature Sorkin feature.

Sorkin does his best work when he finds a way to make the central issue personal when he finds a story with no obvious connection to him that nonetheless mirrors his own deepest beliefs or serves as the forum to relitigate his own private personal emotional dramas, arguments and wounds.

In 1968, The Democratic National Convention was held in Chicago. Following the murders that Spring of Martin Luther King, Jr., and Robert F. Kennedy, the Convention was seen as a referendum on the Vietnam War. Or at least protesters wanted it to become that. Three different protest groups, the Students for a Democratic Society (SDS), the Youth International Party (Yippies), and the National Mobilization Committee to End the War in Vietnam (MOBE), all called upon their supporters to come to Chicago to protest at the convention.

The Convention became the scene of violent riots, with Chicago Police beating protesters. Hubert Humphrey received the Democratic nomination but lost the election to Richard Nixon who campaigned on a Law and Order platform. Once Nixon was in office, his Attorney General John Mitchell ordered the prosecution of the protest leaders: Rennie Davis and Tom Hayden of the SDS, Abbie Hoffman and Jerry Rubin of the Yippies, Dave Dellinger of the Mobilization Committee as well as two other protesters. Bobby Seale, chairman of the Black Panther Party was also indicted.

Judge Julius Hoffman was chosen to hear the case. William Kunstler and Leonard Weinglass were the defense attorneys for the defendants other than Bobby Seale whose lawyer could not make it to Court. Seale was unrepresented and Judge Hoffman would not allow Seale to represent himself. Eventually after Hoffman ordered Seale bound and gagged to end his outbursts, a mistrial was declared for Seale, who left the case.

Sacha Baron Cohen as Abbie Hoffman with Jeremy Strong as Jerry Rubin in Netflix's The Trial of the ... [+] Chicago 7

Sorkin sets up conflict among the characters as well as against the Judge and Nixons Justice Department. In Sorkins telling (which is based on the actual trial transcripts), Tom Hayden (Eddie Redmayne) and Rennie Davis (Alex Sharp) are political activists hoping to change the system in many ways more establishment and more respectful of the judicial system than Abbie Hoffman (Sascha Baron Cohen) and Jerry Rubin (Jeremy Strong), who are set up initially as attention hungry anarchists who care more about publicizing themselves than ending the war; and Dave Dellinger, who is the adult in the room, a pacificist believer in non-violence who wants to bring about the end of the war in Vietnam. There appears to be hostility between Hayden and Hoffman as to how best to win their case or, for that matter, how best to end the Vietnam War.

Judge Julius Hoffman (Frank Langella) comes off as biased, short-tempered, and perhaps senile. William Kunstler (Mark Rylance) appears as earnest, sincere, and mostly trying to keep the peace among his defendants and find a way to make their case in court.

Sorkins magic act is such that after setting up Hayden as the voice of reason for most of the movie, it is Hoffman who saves the day. Likewise, Sacha Baron Cohen who steals the movie in what is his best dramatic performance to date. Sorkins reveal is that Hoffman is the one who sees the clearest, who early on understands that this is a political trial, and that the case and its impact would be made both in court and outside among the protesters and the press. On the witness stand, it is Hoffman who gives the answers that best frame the movie. And true to Sorkins predilections, it is Hoffmans explanation of Haydens grammatical vagaries upon which the movie hangs (Its true, I swear!).

All in all, Sorkin makes a crackling drama out of what was a lengthy and laborious trial and does so in a way that has great resonance to today and the recent Black Lives Matter protestsand, more generally, concerning the Trump administration.

So my review, in short: Watch the Trial of the Chicago 7 youll learn lots and its worth watching for Sacha Baron Cohens performance.

Now, putting that all aside, when a narrative piece of entertainment is fashioned about real people there is always that question of how true the performances and characterizations are to the actual people. Certainly the actors can study film and tape, but most of them never had the opportunity to see these people, in person, in their prime. I did.

Over the course of time, I had the chance to hear speak many of the people portrayed in this movie including Abbie Hoffman, Jerry Rubin, Dave Dellinger, Rennie Davis, Tom Hayden and William Kunstler. And although Sorkin is faithful to the trial transcript, the personalities of the characters were different than what we see onscreen. So, for example, Ryland plays Kunstler with a certain modesty, reticence and seriousness of purpose. Kunstler was more of a firebrand, more passionate, more full of himself. Hayden was like his screen character, aggressive and somewhat professorial, but more blue collar in affect than Redmayne. Rennie Davis was more commanding when he spoke. Dave Dellinger was about right, although he had more gravitas. Jerry Rubin was a bright light, high energy and fun (Sorkin diminishes him in this telling). And as for Abbie, Sacha Baron plays him as a stand-up comic, but a very intelligent one (Closer I would say to Cohen himself than Hoffman).I would say Abbie had more testosterone. He was more combative, more provocative. With Abbie there was always a level of engagement and aggression amid his brilliance that is not evident in the screen performance.

Some 40 years ago, youthful political organizers were put on trial by a US government set on curtailing their rights and punishing them for speaking out in what was more political spectacle than legal proceeding. If the passage of time has sought to blunt that memory, and to forget the names of Abbie Hoffman, Jerry Rubin, Tom Hayden, Rennie Davis, Dave Dellinger, Bobby Seale and Bill Kunstler, Aaron Sorkin has done them the tribute of giving them new life in his very watchable and superbly acted film, The Trial of the Chicago 7.

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Sorkin's Blast From The Past: The Trial Of the Chicago 7 - Forbes

The president of the United States the leader of the free world, arguably the most powerful person on the planet has contracted a dangerous virus, and Im not sure how I should act.

Oh, I know very well what Im supposed to do. I must choose a side and root for my team from the sidelines. But how boisterous or subdued should I be, how enthusiastic or fretful?

The problem, I realize, is that Im missing the prompting Ive gotten used to. I need a cheerleader to give me the proper cues.

Like the ones I got when I briefly revisited the world of televised professional sports, after symbolically boycotting them for the intrusion of politics then actually missing them a little when they were adjourned sine die by the Trump-thumping virus.

Instead of making me endure the empty stadiums and eerie silence, the game enablers provided me with cardboard cutouts of fans in the stands and played recorded crowd noises. It helped me pretend I was watching something important that other people cared about rather than wasting my precious time on a frivolous, meaningless expenditure of testosterone.

And then there is the canned laughter that has been so instrumental in my enjoyment of situation comedies. I have never had to risk being wrong when I decided something was funny enough to be amusing. The chuckle machine showed me the way.

I notice the same laugh track has made an appearance at the return of Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy! from their COVID-19 hiatus. I do not think an audience is there, since there are no longer panned shots of people applauding. But it sure sounds present and accounted for, snickering or guffawing at the hosts witticisms.

The people who are not there. Like the sounds that really arent there in the movies I watch on Netflix that I once would have left the house for. The click of high heels on linoleum. The whoosh of wind in the trees. The crackle of flames in the fireplace.

Theyre called Foley effects, invented for radio dramas to tickle the imagination. Sound-effects specialists would make bone-injury noises with frozen romaine lettuce, horse-hoof sounds with coconut shells, thunder with thin metal sheets, creaking doors with, well, creaking doors. When sound movies came along, so did the Foley artists to add depth and immediacy to the audio quality.

Reality enhanced. Reality augmented. Reality intensified. We could use that right now.

Donald Trump is, after all, the former reality show star, the first game show host ever elected to the highest office in the land. If were all just trapped inside the ultimate reality show, shouldnt we demand the ultimate thrill ride until the next commercial break?

Trumps opponents shouldnt have to settle for merely listening to the talking heads at CNN and MSNBC excoriating the president as a fool and a knave and a heartless, incompetent dictator who should just die as soon as possible, drooling and babbling in a virus-induced fever. There should be angry mob noises at the mere sound of his name, shouts and jeers and taunts and the Foley-created sounds of torches being lit and chains being rattled.

And his supporters shouldnt be content with just watching Fox News or listening to Rush Limbaugh to hear that Trump is the best president ever, achieving historic, world-shaking successes despite the obstructionist tactics of his evil, unpatriotic opponents who are little better than treasonous scum. There should be the sounds of champagne corks popping and the majestic strains of Hail to the Chief as the adoring multitudes prayerfully chant his name.

In the radio show of my mind, I can hear the teeth gnashing, see the hair pulling, feel the cynicism building to a boiling point. Just pick a side, my fans are shouting; tell us who you think is right and wrong. Youre not fooling anyone, my critics are sneering; we know which side youre really on when youre not pretending otherwise.

But, gentle readers, during such a grave moment, a potential turning point in our history, shouldnt we be able to bridge the partisan divide and unite to work together as one great American people on a common purpose with courage and understanding?

Cue wild applause, whistles, stomping of feet, heartfelt laughter and tears of joy, shouts of Way to go, champ! and Atta boy, Leo as America the Beautiful begins to play. Fade to commercial.

Leo Morris, columnist for The Indiana Policy Review, can be contacted at leoedits@yahoo.com.

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Oct. 7 - The radio show in my mind | Columnists | fwbusiness.com - FW Business

The president of the United States the leader of the free world, arguably the most powerful person on the planet has contracted a dangerous virus, and Im not sure how I should act.

Oh, I know very well what Im supposed to do. I must choose a side and root for my team from the sidelines. But how boisterous or subdued should I be, how enthusiastic or fretful?

The problem, I realize, is that Im missing the prompting Ive gotten used to. I need a cheerleader to give me the proper cues.

Like the ones I got when I briefly revisited the world of televised professional sports, after symbolically boycotting them for the intrusion of politics then actually missing them a little when they were adjourned sine die by the Trump-thumping virus.

Instead of making me endure the empty stadiums and eerie silence, the game enablers provided me with cardboard cutouts of fans in the stands and played recorded crowd noises. It helped me pretend I was watching something important that other people cared about rather than wasting my precious time on a frivolous, meaningless expenditure of testosterone.

And then there is the canned laughter that has been so instrumental in my enjoyment of situation comedies. I have never had to risk being wrong when I decided something was funny enough to be amusing. The chuckle machine showed me the way.

I notice the same laugh track has made an appearance at the return of Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy! from their COVID-19 hiatus. I do not think an audience is there, since there are no longer panned shots people applauding. But it sure sounds present and accounted for, snickering or guffawing at the hosts witticisms.

The people who are not there. Like the sounds that really arent there in the movies I watch on Netflix that I once would have left the house for. The click of high heels on linoleum. The whoosh of wind in the trees. The crackle of flames in the fireplace.

Theyre called Foley effects, invented for radio dramas to tickle the imagination. Sound-effects specialists would make bone-injury noises with frozen romaine lettuce, horse-hoof sounds with coconut shells, thunder with thin metal sheets, creaking doors with, well, creaking doors. When sound movies came along, so did the Foley artists to add depth and immediacy to the audio quality.

Reality enhanced. Reality augmented. Reality intensified. We could use that right now.

Donald Trump is, after all, the former reality show star, the first game show host ever elected to the highest office in the land. If were all just trapped inside the ultimate reality show, shouldnt we demand the ultimate thrill ride until the next commercial break?

Trumps opponents shouldnt have to settle for merely listening to the talking heads at CNN and MSNBC excoriating the president as a fool and a knave and a heartless, incompetent dictator who should just die as soon as possible, drooling and babbling in a virus-induced fever. There should be angry mob noises at the mere sound of his name, shouts and jeers and taunts and the Foley-created sounds of torches being lit and chains being rattled.

And his supporters shouldnt be content with just watching Fox News or listening to Rush Limbaugh to hear that Trump is the best president ever, achieving historic, world-shaking successes despite the obstructionist tactics of his evil, unpatriotic opponents who are little better than treasonous scum. There should be the sounds of champagne corks popping and the majestic strains of Hail to the Chief as the adoring multitudes prayerfully chant his name.

In the radio show of my mind, I can hear the teeth gnashing, see the hair pulling, feel the cynicism building to a boiling point. Just pick a side, my fans are shouting; tell us who you think is right and wrong. Youre not fooling anyone, my critics are sneering; we know which side youre really on when youre not pretending otherwise.

But, gentle readers, during such a grave moment, a potential turning point in our history, shouldnt we be able to bridge the partisan divide and unite to work together as one great American people on a common purpose with courage and understanding?

Cue wild applause, whistles, stomping of feet, heartfelt laughter and tears of joy, shouts of Way to go, champ! and Atta Boy, Leo as America the Beautiful begins to play.

Leo Morris, columnist for The Indiana Policy Review, is winner of the Hoosier Press Associations award for Best Editorial Writer.

Read more here:
MORRIS: The radio show in my mind | Opinion | newsbug.info - Newsbug.info

Five things we learned from the Los Angeles Lakers 124-114 victory over the Miami Heat in Game 2 of the 2020 Finals Friday in the Orlando bubble:

* * *

It certainly was a little-brother Game 2. Thats when an outcome never is in doubt and barely even competitive, thanks to the older-brother Lakers sensing they could grab control (mostly with their offense) whenever they needed to do so.

Miami essentially was kept on a bungee cord all night. Sometimes they were way behind, sometimes they were closer. After the Lakers got out in front by eight points deep into the first quarter, the closest the Heat got that period was six. In the second, L.A.s lead grew to 13, dwindled to four, then jumpedup to 14 by halftime.

Second half, more of the same: Up by 18, never leading by less than nine in the third. Then double digits for all but 20 seconds in the fourth.

Kujos, as Michael Jordan used to say, to those viewers who stuck with it to the inevitable end.

Playing without point guard Goran Dragic (plantar fasciitis) and center Bam Adebayo (neck/shoulder strain), two of its three best players, as it did Friday, Miami was pretty much airport code -- MIA -- on its way to a2-0 hole. Not to say there isnt hope, considering that four teams in Finals history have overcome that start.

The 1969 Celtics, the 1977 Trail Blazers, the 2006 Heat and the 2016 Cavaliers each clawed back to eventually celebrate. But Bill Russell, Bill Walton and Dwayne Wade arent walking through that door, and when LeBron James does so for Game 3 on Sunday(ABC, 7:30 p.m. ET), hell be turning left for the opponents locker room.

Miami can muster as much spit n vinegar as it wants, but its words arent going to hurt and its punches arent going to land as long as the Lakers have a hand on their forehead, keeping the littler fellas at an Anthony Davis-arms length.

We're never giving up, Heat leader Jimmy Butler said. We're going to fight and we're going to ride with this thing until the wheels fall off. It's not over. We're just down 0-2, so we got to do something special. We're capable of it and I wouldn't want to be in the trenches with any other guys except for the ones that we have.

Except for maybe Russell, Walton, Wade and

A case can me made for Kentavious Caldwell-Pope, a handy Derringer of a player who always seems good for a couple of timely shots each game. Alex Caruso shines, but mostly because he continues to be grossly underestimated. Kyle Kuzma? Not yet.

Its pretty clear now that the third-best, certainly the third-most valuable and important Laker in the postseason behind James and Davis is Rajon Rondo. The 34-year-old veteran of 14 NBA seasons and deep playoff runs in his long-ago Boston incarnation has been indispensable for several reasons.

Perhaps the biggest is the trust coach Frank Vogel and teammates have in Rondo to run their attack. Against Miami, that means a creator savvy enough to see whats needed -- for instance, getting into the heart of the Heats zone defense with the ability to make plays.

A second benefit is that when Rondo has the ball in his hands, James doesnt have to. Now that hes 35, if James had to play the 39 minutes he logged in Game 2 the way he used to play five or 10 years ago, hed be tuckered out or cramped up before the buzzer. This way, Rondo gets LeBron off the ball, enabling him to conserve energy on offensive possession (and take off defensive possessions less often).

Its worth a historical note here: Rondo moved up to sixth on the all-time NBA playoffs assists list Friday and now has 1,063. He passed Larry Bird (1,062) and Steve Nash (1,061) with 10 in 26 minutes.

I didnt grow up with hoop dreams, Rondo said. The past names that I passed in the playoffs from Isiah [Thomas] to Michael [Jordan] to Kobe [Bryant] to Steve and Larry. I couldnt even dream of that opportunity. I played with a lot of great teammates that obviously made shots for me.

That brings us to a third reason Rondo has been L.A.s No. 3: Now hes making shots for his teammates. Specifically, those desirable ones from the arc.

In Rondos first 96 appearances over seven postseasons from 2008 to 2017, he shot .266 (29 of 109) on 3-pointers. In his last two playoff runs, though, he has shot .439 (25 of 57). So far in this series, he has taken nine, made four.

The Heats best player -- in Dragics and Adebayos absences, definitely --took heat on the broadcast of Game 2 from Mark Jackson for not seeking out his own shot more often. We wont nitpick with that, even though Butlers 1-of-3 shooting didnt capture the eight free throws he had shot to that point (which suggests four more shots for a 28-attempt pace for the game).

Jeff Van Gundy chimed in, too, after Butler a couple of times too often attacked the paint, got near the rim, went into the air and predictably looked for a Heat teammate on the perimeter to whom he could pass. As skilled and strong as Butler is, Van Gundy said, he first should be looking to score.

Theres a case to be made that Miami needs Butler to go off for 15-20 points in the first quarter Sunday, particularly if the cavalry doesnt arrive via his two injured cohorts. It might take pressure off other guys to know the scoring load wont fall so much to them. Maybe it would get the Lakers defense to scrambling in a way they wouldnt enjoy.

Then again, Vogel and his crew could concentrate on choking off Butler completely, daring -- who, Tyler Herro, Kendrick Nunn or Kelly Olynyk to carry the day in a must-win Finals situation?

Butler finished with 25 points, eight rebounds and 13 assists. He shot 12 free throws, twice what anyone else on the floor managed. This is throwback stuff to the criticism LeBron has taken in his career for favoring the right basketball play over scoring a boatload of points. More points for Butler would have meant fewer for teammates he wouldnt have passed to.

Besides, offense wasnt the Heats problem. And lets not forget that early Jordan scored 63 in a playoff game and lost because he didnt have much help.

I will continue to play that way because that's how we're going to win, that's how we played all year long, Butler said. Just because we're in the Finals it's not going to change.

Scoring points wasnt Miamis problem -- everyone one in their authorized bubble party would tell you 114 should have been plenty to win. But their zone defense configurations never really stymied the Lakers, who seemed almost giddy in hoisting 47 3-pointers, as long as they could exploit the Heats tactic inside as well.

And exploit they did. L.A. made 33 of 50 2-pointers, scored 56 points in the paint and turned 16 offensive rebounds into 21 second-chance points. The Lakers also outscored the Heat by 15 on 3-pointers alone, lousy percentage or not.

Why play zone when the results were so bad? Miami was thin on alternatives, with its best defender (Adebayo) out and targeted guys such as Herro and Duncan Robinson playing extra minutes.

Also, Miami coach Erik Spoelstra didnt question the strategy as much as the execution. Going zone has some natural downsides -- blocking out for rebounds gets trickier, and theres a passivity that can settle in compared to man-to-man. Still, Spoelstra expected more individually within that team framework.

Said Spoelstra: I don't think it really would have mattered man or zone, there was probably eight, 10 of those possessions where we just did not finish it with that next level of commitment. This opponent is going to require us to go there.

Enough with all the talk about who isnt available for Miami. Lets talk about someone who is: Udonis Haslem. U.D., as hes known. Or the OG, as teammates call him.

If only the veteran forward could get on the court and focus his wrath on the Lakers the way he did on the Heat huddle during a third-quarter timeout.

That was a blistering, a testosterone-fueled challenge to his teammates to play harder, get tougher and empty their tanks, Butler said later. It was not suitable for the airwaves. The Heat briefly showed some life after that.

"Maybe he should just start the game off cussing people out," Butler joked.

Better still, in a series without any real dislike or certainly rancor among the players, Haslem could sprinkle a little by knocking around James and his new Super Friend Davis. Theoretically, anyway, since at 40, Haslem played only 44 minutes all season and hasnt touched the floor in the playoffs.

No one would dare say the Heat players dont respect and heed Haslems advice. Having him in uniform -- in warm-ups, at least -- gives his voice a little extra heft, in boss Pat Rileys mind, compared to sitting in a suit in the second row.

But this series is past exhortations. Haslem could lead by example, if only for a few bumpy-bangy minutes at a time. If you dont have your Bam, you have to find someone else to lay a little wham on the too-comfortable Lakers.

* * *

Steve Aschburner has written about the NBA since 1980. You can e-mail himhere, findhis archive hereandfollow him on Twitter.

The views on this page do not necessarily reflect the views of the NBA, its clubs or Turner Broadcasting.

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5 things we learned from Game 2 of 2020 Finals - NBA.com

When John Squire was first diagnosed with bladder cancer in January 2014, he was hopeful that treatment with bacillus CalmetteGuerin (BCG) would be effective. An immunotherapy vaccine made from a bacterium similar to the one that causes tuberculosis, BCG is administered through a catheter directly into the bladder, where it comes into contact with cancer cells and prompts the immune system to attack them. The advantage of this approach is that it causes few long-term side effects.

But a year later, Squires cancer came back, and this time the tumor had penetrated the muscular wall of the bladder. This meant he would need more intensive treatment.

I knew I had to have my bladder removed, but I needed to decide what kind of system I wanted to drain urine, recalls Squire, 75, of Rockville, Maryland. My options were to have the doctors construct a new bladder, have an internal pouch or an external one. I decided on the latter approach. I thought it was the simplest way to take care of urination, with the reassurance that the surgery would get rid of the cancer for good.

Yet this surgery comes with significant consequences. Dr. Trinity Bivalacqua, director of urologic oncology at Johns Hopkins Medicine, had to remove Squires bladder, prostate and seminal vesicles. Although Bivalacqua was able to spare the neurovascular bundle, which plays a key role in supplying blood to the penis and enabling men to have an erection, the surgery nonetheless injured those nerves and the surrounding muscle. For most men, this results in difficulty having an erection, or erectile dysfunction.

Squire was no exception. He tried some of the most common interventions, such as the oral medications Viagra (sildenafil citrate) and Cialis (tadalafil) and shots administered into the penis, but the pills didnt work for him, and he didnt care for the injections. He decided not to pursue those options.

For me, a traditional sex life wasnt the be all and the end all, Squire says, and that was true for my partner, Jean Sommerfield, as well. But weve been able to find other ways to give each other physical pleasure. Importantly, Ive been cancer-free for five years. Im happy that I was given another chance at life.

While Squire has adjusted well to the changes hes faced, male and female sexual problems that arise from treatment for bladder cancer, as well as those experienced by men after prostate cancer therapy, can create lasting challenges for many survivors.

Sexual dysfunction that may be temporary can develop after chemotherapy or radiation, and nerve damage from surgery can cause long-term effects. Men treated for prostate cancer with testosterone- suppressing drugs also experience sexual dysfunction. And while the problem is treatable with a variety of strategies, it is not always reversible. Only about half of men who undergo a nerve-sparing cystectomy, or removal of the bladder, recover their natural erectile function after two years, according to Bivalacqua.

Developing self-acceptance and adopting open communication with partners and new strategies for intimacy can help survivors acclimate to these changes. Fortunately, there is a lot of support available.

According to the American Cancer Society, in the United States, about 191,930 men are likely to be diagnosed with prostate cancer in 2020, while 62,100 men may receive a diagnosis of bladder cancer. That means 254,030 men may face treatment, along with its accompanying side effects.

Cystectomy is typically performed in patients with stages 2 to 4 bladder cancer, and radical prostatectomy, meaning removal of the prostate and surrounding tissues, is performed in men with stages 2 or 3 prostate cancer.

Whether a man has his prostate removed to treat prostate cancer or his bladder and prostate taken out to treat bladder cancer, the impact is going to be very similar, explains Dr. Run Wang, a urologist with UT Physicians/ McGovern Medical School at UTHealth and The University of Texas MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston and an expert on sexual function following cancer treatment. Even with nerve-sparing surgery, the impact on sexual function is immediate.

Depending on the mans age and erectile status before surgery, it may take between three and six months for some function to start coming back, and a year or two for a maximal recovery of erection. Even then, not all men get their sexual function back.

Wang points out that its important to resume sexual activity as early as possible following surgery. By engaging in some activity, even masturbation, blood flow to the penis is increased, helping to preserve the tissue and improving the likelihood of achieving erections, he says. To help restore function through temporary methods that allow more immediate sexual activity, he adds, between 80% and 90% of men in my practice do choose some intervention following surgery.

For most men, pills are usually the first treatment option, but often they are not enough. At that point, many men try penile injections, which they learn to administer themselves, before they want to have intercourse. One medicine or a combination of several are injected into the penis. According to Bivalacqua, if the surgery was done properly, injections should result in functional erections.

If both of these interventions fail, men may consider a penile prosthesis. This device must be surgically implanted and consists of a reservoir of saline, two cylinders and a pump. When a man presses the pump, the saline flows into the cylinders, causing an erection. This device is highly effective, working for most men who use it.

Nonetheless, most men experience some depression as they come to terms with the changes in their bodies. To avoid some of the emotional shock, men and their partners should be educated before surgery about what to expect in terms of sexual function, Wang says. For example, men should be told that their erections wont be as firm, and when they have an orgasm, they will not have ejaculate.

Surprisingly, some young men are unaware that the surgery will make them infertile, so that, too, has to be made clear. Another thing many men dont know is that they can sometimes have an orgasm without an erection, usually by masturbating. Having this information on hand and being prepared for these changes helps in the recovery process, as does therapy and sexual counseling with a trained professional.

Both men and women can get bladder cancer, although it is more common in men. In addition to the 62,100 men who will likely be diagnosed in 2020, about 19,300 women will receive this diagnosis. Regardless of gender, once the cancer invades the bladders muscular wall, surgery is usually the treatment of choice. Part of the surgery involves developing a new system for draining urine. Options include an ileal conduit, which includes an external pouch; an internal pouch called a continent cutaneous pouch; or a neobladder, constructed from part of the small intestine. There are pros and cons to each approach.

Squire opted for the ileal conduit, which involves having a stoma, or opening, created in the abdomen with an ostomy bag placed over it. He thought this approach would be the easiest to manage. The internal pouch felt complicated because I would have had to use a catheter to drain it every few hours, he says. And, I heard that there was a lot of incontinence with the neobladders. The option I chose works well, though initially my ostomy bag leaked. I quickly discovered that the problem was that I wasnt using the right kind. Once I fixed that, I havent had any problems.

Dr. Mohit Khera, a urologist at Baylor College of Medicine in Houston, notes that, for some men, having an ostomy bag can affect sexual function psychologically. They may feel disfigured, he says. For this reason, a majority prefer a neobladder, but there are potential side effects associated with this approach. Urinary tract infections are pretty common, as are stones in the bladder and scarring of the ureters going into the neobladder.

With the urinary issues addressed, both men and women have to adjust to the changes in their bodies as they consider resuming a sexual relationship with their partners. Just as men will need assistance getting an erection, women sometimes have to deal with the ramifications of having their uterus and ovaries removed. In some instances, the vaginal wall, where the bladder sits, also may need to be removed, although doctors try to avoid taking out these organs whenever possible so that intercourse will remain possible. Significant changes result from surgery, many of which have a direct impact on a womans sex life.

Not only do women experience vaginal dryness, but they also may have pain during sex, Khera says. If women have an ostomy bag, they may experience poor self- image, leading to a lack of desire. Fortunately, there are remedies to address these problems.

Jeanne Carter, head of Memorial Sloan Ketterings Female Sexual Medicine and Womens Health programs in New York, concurs, emphasizing that the first step is seeking help for sexual difficulties. A woman may come alone or with a partner, and during the initial consulta- tion, we talk about her needs and concerns in a safe, comfortable environment, Carter says.

Addressing vaginal dryness and the pain and discom- fort it causes is often the place to start. Many women dont realize that theres a difference between moistur- izers and lubricants, Carter explains. Nonhormonal moisturizers are for tissue quality and come as gels, creams or suppositories. For patients with cancer and survivors, they can be applied as often as three to five times a week for symptom relief and to maintain vaginal health. Lubricants are liquids or gels that are applied for sexual touch or vaginal insertion to decrease friction and enhance enjoyment. Both complement each other and are used for different reasons.

For women experiencing vaginal tightness another common problem that arises after surgery dilators use a simple device that can help tremendously.

We recommend dilators, cylinder devices used to stretch the vagina, Carter says. They come in different sizes and can help women learn how to relax pelvic floor muscles. A smaller dilator can help reduce pain before a vaginal exam, while a larger one works to prepare the vagina for penetration. They can go a long way in reducing discomfort and building a womans confidence about intimacy and future exams.

Coupled with these approaches, Carter also suggests that women do pelvic floor exercises, called Kegel exer- cises. They involve tightening the pelvic floor muscles for three to five seconds and then relaxing them for an equal amount of time, repeating until muscle fatigue sets in. These exercises are easy to do and can help women learn how to control these muscles.

Finally, two medications approved by the United States Food and Drug Administration are available to help women who have a decreased interest in sex. Addyi (flibanserin) is a pill that acts on brain chemistry to stimulate desire. It must be taken every day. Vyleesi (bremelanotide), an injection that is administered before intercourse, also targets the brains hormones to activate desire.

Women should be aware, however, that according to the National Womens Health Network, the clinical trials included mostly White women, and the medications were effective only for a relatively small number of women between 8% and 13% for Addyi, and 8% for Vyleesi. In addition, there are side effects associated with the drugs.

The most common with Addyi are dizziness, sleepiness, nausea, fatigue, insomnia and dry mouth, and with Vyleesi, the most common are nausea and vomiting, flushing, injection site reactions and headache.

Having a fulfilling sexual relationship involves more than addressing the changes to the body resulting from treat- ment. Both men and women need to be psychologically ready, as well, which often means coming to terms with the ordeal they have been through. Daniela Whittmann, a clinical social worker, certified sex therapist and associate professor of urology at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor, points out in a webinar presented under the auspices of the Bladder Cancer Advocacy Network that women need to go through a period of grieving for what they have lost before they can begin to build a new kind of sexual relationship. Whittmann stresses that intimacy will be different but can be just as satisfying.

Khera agrees, adding that what he calls the four pillars of health diet, exercise, sleep and stress reduction can make a big difference. Vigorous exercise 90 minutes a week, getting seven hours of sleep each night and reducing the stress in your life can help improve an individuals desire for sex, he says. And above all, avoid smoking, which can significantly increase the risk of many kinds of cancer, including bladder cancer.

Perhaps the most important part of recovery for both men and women is communication. A couple needs to talk about what they are looking for in their sexual relationship, what new ways they can give each other pleasure and how they can continue to reinforce their emotional intimacy.

Khera adds that setting new expectations and goals is a key part of the recovery process. Having a supportive sexual partner is essential, he says. If both partners encourage each other, theres a good chance that they can find a way to be successful.

Some couples learn to redefine intimacy. John and I find deep satisfaction with emotional intimacy, traveling together, spending time together and enjoying each others company at home, says Sommerfield, 72, Squires partner of seven years. John and I have maintained a fulfilling physical sexual relationship. We continue to give one another phys- ical pleasure, just not through traditional intercourse. We know that cancer doesnt stop your life. In fact, it has made us both and our relationship stronger.

See more here:
There is Help for Patients Dealing with Sexual Side Effects After Prostate, Bladder Cancer Treatment - Curetoday.com

The towns in the Hamptons (on the south fork of Long Islands eastern tip) are collectively one of the most competitive real estate markets in America. Massive homes that go for millions of dollars, often on the beach or the bay. And because most of them are vacation homes, the people that the over 2500 realtors in the area work with are massively wealthy. Million Dollar Beach House follows five realtors from the Nest Seekers agency in East Hampton as they try to broker massive deals that will fetch them and the agency six-figure commissions.

Opening Shot: Shots of spectacular homes around The Hamptons. Then we get a shot of an amazing, dark-wood-clad house with an infinity pool. Inside, a realtor is telling a new colleague that hes going to give a practice walk-through to two of his colleagues.

The Gist: Million Dollar Beach House flips the gender equation of its fellow Netflix show, Selling Sunset; of the five realtors the show follows, four of them are men. James Giugliano is a top realtor who built himself up from the bottom in five short years. J.B. Andreassi is the rookie realtor, who has worked in real estate before, just not at the level he will be in The Hamptons. Hes actually from the area, and has returned to rebuild his life for reasons we have yet to find out. His high school friend Mike Fulfree, a top realtor at the agency, is about to have his first child and is sweating the fact that he and his wife are going to have to get ready for this during peak selling season (Memorial Day to Labor Day; no deals get done after the summer season is over).

Mike, whos a former model but still has a lot of Long Island in him, doesnt particularly get along with Noel Roberts, whom he thinks is too polished. Noel who pronounces his name like Billy Joel pronounces his last name, instead of the Christmas way has a bead on a spectacular oceanfront home that he thinks he can get the listing for. One thing he needs to do is to convince the owner, who poured millions into the house to make it her dream home to sell. And to do that, he puts out a stunning number: $35 million.

He takes the only woman in the office, Peggy Zakakolas, around the home with the owner, and is irritated that Peggy is doing all the talking. But Peggy, who worked for Nest Seekers in Manhattan and thinks her Rolodex of millionaires will be an advantage to her and the agency in the Hamptons, scoffs at the price Noel throws out to the owner, which is almost twice as high as anything in the area. She feels hes doing it to get the listing and the big score on the off chance he can get a buyer, but he thinks because of all the time and effort put into the house, its worth just that much.

Our Take: One of the things that makesSelling Sunset a success is that it not only has some interesting personalities among its cast, with juicy personal stories, but the real estate office there actually looks and feels like a real, functional office (even if its not, at least the producers do a good job of making it seem that way). The realtors onMillion Dollar Beach House, on the other hand, feel like they were cast in the roles of realtors. Every one of them have just started at the office in the past year, and the only one who looks like they have any kind of real estate experience is Peggy. The rest of them fumble around and make mistakes that your local Century 21 agent selling $200,000 houses doesnt make.

There are two tip-offs that the show is manufactured. First, theres the silly office layout, where the desks face each other in a zig-zag fashion so that the realtors are perfectly set up to chit-chat with each other when theyre in the office. The second is that theres no manager or agency owner in sight. So theres no one to call a meeting, no one to find out the status of the sales, no one to help direct any of these realtors. So in both ways, the office doesnt seem to function like an actual realty office, just a soundstage for pretty people to chat between house porn shots.

Because of the gender makeup of the show, and where its located, the energy of the show is a bit too brotastic for our tastes. When Peggy helps Mike set up an open house for the house he calls the Patti Shack, he walks around with his shirt open, revealing part of his massive chest tattoo. Classy. But it feels like the producers want to set up the rivalries between realtors immediately, so within the first five minutes, were already getting Mike making fun of how Noel pronounces his name.

It just feels like the show is set up for conflict and house porn, with personalities that show nothing but testosterone-fueled competitiveness (and that includes Peggy). But none of the cast is interesting enough to want to follow, even after watching the first two episodes. It also doesnt help to see rich people buying massive houses during a summer where none of us can go anywhere and many of us dont have jobs anymore.

Sex and Skin: Lots of house porn, but no sex or skin among the cast.

Parting Shot: Patti, the owner of the Patti Shack arrives during the open house (i.e. the biggest no-no in realty 101) and doesnt like the changes Mike made in order to stage the house for his intended buyer, a single finance bro or tech dude.

Sleeper Star: Noel, only because we find out in episode two that he has a twin brother named Joel (pronounced Jo-el), who is irritated that his brother changed the pronunciation of his name so their names no longer rhyme.

Most Pilot-y Line: Mike and J.B. skateboarding was a pretty dumb scene, especially because Mike is such a big guy. It also made them look completely like idiot kids instead of adults. Also, J.B. went to Dartmouth but somehow still doesnt know how to speak proper English.

Our Call: SKIP IT.Million Dollar Beach Housetries to force conflict, but its vibe is too aggro, especially against the backdrop of the lavish homes the realtors are selling.

Joel Keller (@joelkeller) writes about food, entertainment, parenting and tech, but he doesnt kid himself: hes a TV junkie. His writing has appeared in the New York Times, Slate, Salon, VanityFair.com, Playboy.com, Fast Company.com, RollingStone.com, Billboard and elsewhere.

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Stream It Or Skip It: 'Million Dollar Beach House' On Netflix, A Reality Series About Brotastic Realtors Selling Massive Hamptons Vacation Homes -...

Not long ago, a successful Silicon Valley tech entrepreneur decided to make a risky new investment hed been toying with for years. Id just hit 50 and sold my second company, he recalls. I looked at myself and thought, I have another 20 years of work in front of me, so Im going to go do this now.

Marc paid $25,000 for a lower face-lift and a nose job. (His name and those of the other patients who spoke to Robb Report have been changed at their request.) One of the best investments Ive made, he says. Unlike other investments in Marcs career, this one was a closely guarded secret, known only to his doctor, wife, brotherand now you.

Nine out of 10 cosmetic procedures in the US are performed on women. Yet to Marc and a growing number of high-flying men, nips, tucks and injections have become stealth weapons to deploy in a Darwinian battle for corporate survival. I play in the high-tech and start-up world, where older individuals will be passed over, says Marc, who also got his first Botox shots this year. The software wars take a lot of energy and commitment. I simply aligned my outer appearance with my inner perspective.

Its not just about advantage in a youth-oriented workplace. As gender roles evolve, vanity is losing much of its stigma for men in general. The beauty buffet, once ladies-only, is now open to all, with men increasingly moving from the hors doeuvres (grooming, beard cultivation, skin care, dieting and exercising) to the appetizers (cosmetic dentistry, hair replacement, hormone therapy) and on to the entrees (Botox, fillers, non-invasive fat reduction) before ordering up the piece de resistance: plastic surgery. Chanel, Fenty and Tom Ford now also offer a once-unthinkable side dish: makeup for men, leading them into the realm of foundation and eyebrow gel.

Tom Fords makeup for men.Tom Ford

Men dont use the word beauty, of course. Women talk about beauty. Men talk about vitality, virility, competitive edgethats a masculine way of describing what is essentially vanity, says William Liu, professor of psychology at the University of Maryland, who specializes in issues around masculinity. But what they are really talking about is warding off existential anxiety around death.

The idea of stigma has changed, says Marc. Women should not always have to look made-up, and men can wear makeup. Those mores are changing. Theres still a little bit of raising an eyebrow right now, but its becoming much more acceptable. Some people like to spend money on expensive cars. I like to spend money on myselfI consider my body to be the vehicle I drive in.

For some, cosmetic procedures fit smoothly into the narrative of personal empowerment and the growing idea that you can create yourself: your gender, your face, your identity. Its the old American idea of self-improvement, sliced and diced for the 21st century. Behavior that would once have seemed narcissistic has been reframed as an act of self-care. For starters, technology means theres no longer any need to tolerate physical imperfection. Plus, while millennials are accepting of quirky traits and would be loath to admit to holding a single ideal aesthetic, they also consider the very notion of judging other peoples lifestyle choices so old-fashioned that any taboo surrounding cosmetic enhancements seems like a relic from another era. So lets all get lip fillers.

And they will: Millennials are nearly twice as likely as people over 35 to be considering a cosmetic procedure in the next year, according to a poll last year by RealSelf, a cosmetic-surgery review website. The trend is toward transparency and removal of stigma for everything to do with self-care and self-love, says Simon Ourian, M.D., whom Kylie Jenner has credited forher signature pout with Juvederm, an investment on which Jenner has since built a nine-figure cosmetics business.

More cosmetic work is done in the United States than in any other country, according to a study by the International Society of Aesthetic Plastic Surgery. In 2018, the last year for which figures are available, the American Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS) reports that Americans spent a record $16.5 billion on plastic surgery and its twin progeny, Botox and fillers. Botox and other botulinum-toxin brands accounted for 42 percent of the 17.7 million procedures performed in the US by plastic surgeons that year. The real number of such injections is far higher, because they are also routinely dispensed by dentists, dermatologists, ophthalmologists and even walk-in beauty bars.

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More men are being seduced by these speedy pick-me-ups as the barriers to entry, both practical and social, diminish. In the US, male use of fillers and Botox has risen by 101 percent and 381 percent, respectively, since 2000, according to the ASPS, while the number of surgical nose jobs has dropped by 65 percent. Demand for handsome noses has not declined: Its just that many men now have their noses adjusted with less daunting fillers instead, according to Alan Matarasso, M.D., a plastic surgeon on New Yorks Upper East Side.

All the leading cosmetic surgeons and dermatologists interviewed for this article say men account for 20 to 35 percent of their clientele, a proportion that is growing while also broadening in scope. As with most style trends, gay men were the first to catch on. Then came the metrosexual type that would come in for Botox after their manicure, as David Mabrie, M.D., a facial plastic surgeon in San Francisco, recounts. Now its more mainstream guys. Guys guys. Men who a few years ago would have considered it a burden to trim a four-inch hair growing out of their ear are now smoothing their fine lines and filling their nasolabial folds.

In New York, the male clientele for Gerald Imber, M.D., has changed from largely those in entertainment to 95 percent CEOs and similarly accomplished professionals. These guys spend more on jet fuel coming to New York than they do on me, he says. Fifteen years ago, says Ourian, his Los Angeles patients were likely to be in entertainment, but the trend has completely changed and they are now from all walks of life. He adds that his practice includes ultra-wealthy businessmen, politicians, heads of state, three kings and five queens.

Even so, enough residual stigma remains that most men keep their Botox habits secret. And for some, the thrill of a clandestine hobby is part of the appeal. Marc likens it to membership in an exclusive club. One of Imbers patients, a 67-year-old real-estate developer from New Jersey, whom well call Nick, also relishes being a member of a secret elite club, in which the members are unknown even to each other. No one knows about it, he says. Thats just my masculine insecurityits a vanity issue. I work a lot with the construction industry, and no one there goes into work and says, I just had a face-lift.

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Nick felt that his jowly, hangdog face didnt match his gym-honed physique. I thought, If I cut my head off, I would look a lot younger, he says with a chuckle. But before I do that, Ill see if Dr. Imber can help. So three years ago, he took his girlfriend, whos 20 years his junior, for some couples liposuctionthat was the test runand followed up with a facelift.

I checked into the Carlyle, stayed three days, took the wrappings off and went home, Nick recalls. When I went out, I ran into people I knew at a restaurant. They asked if Id been on vacation. He describes with delight how he was asked for ID at a senior citizens lockdown shopping hour at a grocery store in the Hamptons.

Age has become elastic. On the one hand, Nick does not consider himself old at 67, but in youth-obsessed Silicon Valley, 35 is thought over the hill. There, the surgery is starting younger and younger, as tech-industry executives, who are mostly male, strive to appear relevant to their millennial overlords.

Larry Fan, M.D., a San Francisco plastic surgeon, says his clients now describe a work culture where if theyre over 30 they feel less relevant. Their work involves providing services to younger consumers, and tech luminaries are very young. My patients who are in their 50s say, Im the old guy in the room, and I dont want to feel that way. Young people have a kind of OK boomer mentality.

Fan says his male patients ask to look like Elon Musk: Hes aspirational for his work and [looks like he] has had some enhancements done, hair transplants and other things. He looks like a normal person but masculine and chiseled.

Elon MuskAP

Some of Fans patients, whom he describes as senior tech billionaires with famous names, regard cosmetic procedures as a form of bio-hacking (see here). Their mentality is: I want to live forever if I can find a way, Fan says. I believe in technology, and part of that is new treatments that help me have fewer wrinkles.

Ageism in the tech industry is not confined to Silicon Valley, according to one recruitment executive who worked with software start-ups in New York. The hiring managers were in their 30s, he explains. There are laws against saying youre looking for someone young, so instead they would say we need a culture fit. That was the number-one most important factor. Theyre looking for someone to grab a beer with. The recruiter put it down to the hubris that comes with gaining a lot of power at an early age. It means that they dont think they can learn anything from an older person. They feel invincible.

George, 53, the CEO of a large software company in the Bay Area, agrees that a youthful demeanor is a prerequisite in tech. Whatever HR says, you do look at pictures when you hire someone, and you look at their digital footprint, he says. Are they the right cultural fit? Do they take care of themselves? For better or worse, when you hire someone for a high-stress, high-performance job, part of that is their appearance.

In 2010, five years after Georges divorce from his first wife, his daughters took charge of his online dating profile. Being millennials, they said you have to look great online, he recalls. I realized that pictures had become very important, not just from a dating perspective but also on LinkedIn. That was a turning point for me.

He had dabbled in Botox but, with that revelation, became a devotee. A dermatologist who I played golf with said, If you want to stay looking like that, come in. I kept it up until I was 50, then I added fillers once a year, to keep the volume of my face, George says. Last year, he went to Sachin Parikh, M.D., a Palo Alto surgeon, for a hair transplant. George keeps the procedures private, partly as a career strategy. I dont want to talk about it because its still perceived as less manly. Also, men dont like to share tricks that may make them more competitive in the market. I do cryotherapy, I ride the Peloton every day and Ive had all the genetic testing to see what [conditions] I am predisposed to have, what foods do I process well. I see it all on the same spectrum as bio-hacking.

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The paradox of a man being furtive about a procedure he claims is akin to watching his sugar intake is surprisingly common. Talking about going to the gym is OK. Talking about getting a haircut is OK, says Imber. But cosmetic procedures are something they will do for themselves only, and they do not talk about it. In a culture of secrecy, it can be hard for surgeons to attract male clients through word of mouth. But once men are through the door, they keep coming back. Parikh describes the typical profile: The majority have dabbled in teeth whitening and skin care, and they work their way up the ladder from collagen stimulating treatments to fillers and Botox.

Hair-loss consultations can also be a gateway drug to other treatments, says Jessie Cheung, M.D., a Chicago-area dermatologist. A man will typically come in to talk about losing his hair, and we check for hormone deficiencies, she says. If their testosterone is not optimized, I will explain the benefits, and of course they want to perform better. Most clients who come for hormone therapy often get cosmetic treatments, too, and vice versa.

Other in-demand body treatments for men include CoolSculpting, a form of nonsurgical fat removal using cryotherapywildly popular, according to Fan, whose clientele for the procedure is 50 percent maleand skin tightening using ultrasound (Ultherapy) or radio frequency (FaceTite). But injectables are the money-spinner: a 12-year bull run of year-on-year double-digit growth, says Parikh.

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Paul Nassif, M.D., a facial surgeon famous for his TV appearances fixing bad surgery on the E! News show Botched, believes men are becoming more susceptible to the pressures of Instagram perfection. They are now on the same track as women, he says. Eight years ago, men were using Botox for work. Now I would say they are trying to make themselves look better on social media.

With fillers they can look like a filtered photo. We call it selfie dysmorphia. One of the biggest cosmetic trends of last year was the growth of reversal treatments for faulty fillers and surgical procedures, with liposuction revision up by 183 percent, according to RealSelf.

In New York, Matarasso is expecting a flood of business as soon as lockdown restrictions ease, after months of financiers, lawyers and such inspecting their double chins on Zoom. He believes that the crazy unemployment rate will lead to more treatments as job applicants grow desperate to gain an edge over their peers.

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Why Men Are Turning to Cosmetic Procedures for a Competitive Edge in the Boardroom - Robb Report

I got my first hemorrhoid at Boys State. It was the end of my Junior year, and Id been selected to represent my high school at the hallowedalbeit not widely-knownstudent government camp run by the veterans' organization American Legion. There, in a dorm room at Rider University in Central New Jersey, I can recall the hot air from my box fan blowing as I unfurled sheet after sheet of toilet paper, wiping vigorously at an itch that had spread around the diameter of my rear-end like a colony of fire ants. It was the summer of 2008, I was 17, I had been assigned the role of "councilman," and I really had no idea what to do about a hemorrhoid. Id never had one before. But there it was, a confusing little gob of discomfort and irritation that, despite my best efforts, would just not go away. I dont often think about my first hemorrhoid. But like everything about my week at Boys State, its not something Id ever forget.

Boys State is a week-long all-boys politics camp that smacks of old-school, communist-fearing American nationalism. It was founded by the American Legion in 1935 to, as they put it on their website, counter the socialism-inspired Young Pioneer Campschildrens programs in the 1920s and '30s run by Communist-tied groups that taught American kids about, well, Communism. Teaching an alternate form of government to our nations youth wasnt exactly hunky-dory in the Red Scare era. A daughter of one of the founders of Boys State once said in an interview that when her father found out the Young Pioneer Camps were basically the Communists, he got inspired to get the Legion to get involved in a program to teach our government to the students. 85 years later, Boys State is still going strong, with programs in every U.S. State except Hawaii. Take that, Commies.

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Not every Boys State program operates the same way. At the one I attended, eleventh grade boys were chosen to represent NJ high schools at the camp based on their leadership, character, scholarship, loyalty and service in their schools and community. There, students were taught to organize and operate their own state government. You wake up at the crack of dawn to march with your fellow statesmen, sit through long seminars full of patriotic government decorum, vye for fake political seats, debate, legislate. The whole program culminates in the election of a "governor." I spent most of my time wandering around listlessly, playing ultimate frisbee with the other losers, and trying in vain not to embarrass myself in front of the women of the Italian exchange program who were, for some reason, housed on the same campus as us that week. The unofficial instruction was to say Ciao bella when we marched past them.

The program, though not my time in it, is the subject of a documentary from A24 that premiers August 14 on Apple TV+ after winning the U.S. Documentary Competition Grand Jury Prize at Sundance this year. Directed by Jesse Moss and Amanda Baines, the film follows the eventful and at-times melodramatic campaigns of four boys who turn out to be major players in their mock-state government in Texas. The razor-edge campaign film presents an eventful, action-packed version of Boys State that is nothing like what I experienced in 2008. But it nonetheless sent me reeling; I felt a phantom itch of my first hemorrhoid as I watched the loudest, most confident boys in the room rise to prominence while the rest of the mumbling, pimple-faced wimps stood awkwardly in sweat-stained t-shirts on the sidelines.

If Moss and Baines had made this documentary the year I went to Boys State, there's no way I would have been in it: The film only concerns itself with the most successful boys at a Texas camp. Usually in a documentary, this kind of stiltedness in presentation would be a flaw. But the limited perspective in Boys State is actually the films greatest stroke of commentary. By only spending time with the most successful kids on campus, the documentary becomes an incisive microcosm of the American way of law.

What Boys State is about, really, is not just the fact that America is run by boysthat's plain enough to see. Moss and Baines are interested in the kind of boys, specifically, who rise to power and why. I remember them vividly. I remember the chantinghuddles of boys with their arms on each others shoulders, yelling for candidates wed only met a few days prior. I recall impossibly confident speeches, kids on the stump pitching themselves through spittle-covered lips, their cheeks covered in pock-marks and acne, yelling about the tenets of a constitution that, at age 17, I still barely even understood. For these boysthe winners, the boys in the filmBoys State was a place where they really come into their own. For me, Boys State was where I realized the kind of man I never wanted to be.

Courtesy Dom Nero

I always loved my older brothers Boys State shirt. It was a plain white T-shirt with the American Legion Boys State logo on the left breast and a dark blue ring around the collar. Vince used to wear it all the time. Hed have it on above his bathing suit at the boardwalk, or under his Vans track jacket when he came home from dates with his high school girlfriend. I always wanted one for myself. Wearing it wouldnt just prove that Id been selected out of all the guys in my class to represent our high school at some far-off college for a weekbut it would also show that I was as accomplished as my cool older brother. And as the track captain, homecoming champ, and saxophone prodigy, Vince left behind some pretty big Birkenstocks to fill.

I was never a summer camp kid; my older brothers and I rarely ever so much as went on a weekend trip with our friends. In fact, I had a history of calling my mom and asking her to pick me up from sleepovers in the middle of the night. I really had no idea what Boys State wasI just wanted the cool shirt. So you can imagine my surprise when I arrived at the campus to find what resembled a kind of political boot camp for kids who competed in regional debate tournaments. American flags blazed high, there was marching, and the welcome ceremony was full of booming, patriotic decorum. Unlike Vince, who was selected along with a group of his five closest friends, I arrived as one of only two kids chosen from my class. My classmate and I were separated immediately, then placed into rival political parties. We were all sectioned off into little dormitory cities, jostled along by camp counselorsalumni who, for reasons beyond my comprehension, had chosen to volunteer their summers, year after year, to teach state government to teenagers. One of the counselors, at the end of our week there, requested that we roast him. It was strange.

The documentary becomes an incisive microcosm of the American way of law.

After a long first day of orientation seminars and ice breakers, I unpacked the wads of pamphlets about the arduous journey ahead, laying down on the hard blue dorm-issued mattress opposite a boy named Max. I looked out through the cross-slats of my box fan to the field that seemed to stretch on infinitely outside my window in the college dorm. For the first time in my life, far away from my family, friends, and hometown, I was completely alone. All for a damn t-shirt like Vince's.

The kids in the film are in it for way more than a t-shirt. They arrive with strong political convictions, and their week starts on a fever pitchright away, all four students are dead-set on campaigning their way to victory. But they soon find that convictions alone will not bring them gain, at least, not in the two-party system cherished by Boys State. Its going to require a certain amount of selling out, in addition to blind confidence.

Both parties at Boys Statethe Federalists and the Nationalistsstart with no tenets, no platform, only a rulebook inspired by how the real state government parties operate. So its up to the kids to decide their political philosophies. This leaves the young men fighting to the bone over party beliefs that theyd developed only days, or some cases, hours prior. Early on in Boys State we meet Steven Garza, the resolute son of a Mexican immigrant family who seems intent on leading an holistic campaign, and says, Im a Nationalist. What that means yet, I dont know. He goes on to explain that, despite the fact that the party does not yet have a platform, hes already prepared to cast his full support. But at the same time, he continues, theres 600 Nationalists and 600 Federalists. Im going to need some of the Federalist vote. Already, hes willing to drop his convictions to win.

Why? Why sell yourself to a fake government camp where the elected positions have no actual power, where its all just for play? These are kids who already have formidable resumes for their college applications; winning the Governor seat at Boys State isnt going to secure them the spot at Yale. At Boys State, though, its not power, really, that youre trying to gain. The whole thing is a game. And if you choose to play it, you play to win.

According to my profile on the American Legion website, I was designated a Federalist in 2008, something I had such a dim memory of that I had to look it up. To quote Garza, what that meant, I have no idea. I do recall, however, somehow becoming elected "councilman" of my city, and feeling compelled to indulge in some form of political back-patting to help a new friend of mine whod just been elected Police Chief. Im not sure why I did it. But I was initiated in the game at Boys State, and I felt the need to play it.

The whole thing is a game. And if you choose to play it, you play to win.

I dont recall ever attending any "congressional hearings." Perhaps I was too busy guzzling the melted, milky white soft serve from the dining hall which streamed out of the ice cream machine like lukewarm paint thinner. The four young men of Boys State, however, play the game of partisan politics quite well. So well, in fact, that the election in the film ends up being about as exciting and complicated as famous campaign documentaries like The War Room or Primary, both of which seem very influential for Moss and Baines here.

Perhaps youd hope that, given the opportunity, the boys of the next generation would build a more inclusive, more empathetic form of government. In Boys State, at least one of the four main subjects seems totally compelled by that goal. Ren Otero, a Chicago-born teenager and seemingly one of the few Black participants at the entire camp, is first introduced delivering an impressive speech about prison reform at an election for his partys State Chairman position. This young man, in rhetoric alone, seems years ahead of the many manic, over-stimulated teens we meet throughout the film. But while its clear Otero has strong left-leaning motives, the kid is spread thin by the partisan politics of the competition, later saying, [Im] just going to be palatable and congenial to what the body wants. Im going to vote for everything...Im going to keep my job. If its the last thing I do. By the weeks end, Otero is publicly shamed for a political maneuver deemed too partisan by his opponentsnot to mention almost being impeached before facing a wave of racist memes on an Instagram account thats shared and publicized by his rival party.

Otero isnt the only subject in the film whose initial convictions are pulverized by the two-party system, though. We also meet Ben Feinstein, an ambitious self-proclaimed politics junkie and bi-lateral amputee who rushes into the program hungry for the governorship, only to be swayed into taking a lesser role as party chairman. Robert Macgougall is first presented as the farthest-right of the four. But we soon discover that shaggy-haired teen has pro-choice beliefsthis all changes, of course, when Macdougall sees the opportunity of aligning himself with his anti-abortion party. And then theres Garza, who faces a reckoning when his opponents discover a picture of him leading a March for Life rally. He eventually shies away from his morals about gun control, instead adopting a more bi-partisan rhetoric. Go figure.

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Boys State is a tidy narrative. You never see a camera crew on screen, the shots are steady and focused, and the whole thing, at times, seems too good to be true, like it was planned out in a writers room. But I think thats just the point. Moss and Baines didnt capture my experience at Boy State, but they nonetheless presented the feeling of being a useless participant, one of the thousand nameless kids in white t-shirts just watching this surreal Lord of the Flies experiment play out in front of their eyes. Its all therethe flailing for attention, the yelling, the push-up contests, the militaristic flag-waving, the awkward embraces, the sweaty high fives, the arguments with kids youll likely never again see in your life, the longing for companionship with strange young men, many of whom, until this point, have never even left their hometowns.

Whats stuck with me after over ten yearsother than the fact that if you put two box fans next to each other, back to back, they cancel each other out, resulting in an endless vacuum that blows inward and ends up benefitting no oneis the feeling of being different than other men. I think it was the first time I really felt that way, a notion that Ive come to accept as a normal part of my life today. I almost never feel as though I am like other men, especially when Im in large groups of them. I dont think its true; of course everyone feels isolated from time to time, its part of being human. I think Boys State made me feel this way. Not because the boys there alienated me, but because, after suffocating in all the testosterone, perhaps I decided that I did not want to be like them, no way.

By the time my week at Boys State was over, I was so anxious to go home, so deflated by the sleep deprivation and the constant worship of a country that I knew almost nothing about, that I could barely stand up. I remember having a piece of hot dog logged in the back of my throat all day, just feeling it in there for hours and hours during the steaming-hot final ceremonies in the campus gymnasium. I couldve grabbed a tissue, I couldve gone to the bathroom or something. But I was exhausted. And when I finally got out onto the wood chips, out it came. Not through my mouthbut through my nose. The next thing I remember is drifting off to a deep, deep sleep in my parents car on the ride home.

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Boys State, the Subject of an Outstanding New Documentary, Was One of the Strangest Weeks of My Life - Esquire